I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
