I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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