sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
