On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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