Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
