Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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