spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
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