I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
