As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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