we're blogging at a bar
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize