I think my vagina is haunted
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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