JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
