He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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