I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
