what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize