hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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