you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize
