i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize