As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He better not be in your backpack
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
