I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
