remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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