So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
being pregnant is like rehab
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
