This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
