she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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