Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
You smell like stripper and shame
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
