Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
