If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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