Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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