We won't sleep together?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
