I'm gonna have a badass scar
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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