so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
