Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
