she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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