Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
