As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
