Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
