i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
