can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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