I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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