i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize