Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
