$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
