By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
