oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I'm at about main and main street
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
