i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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