if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
