If that was your dad, he is hot
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Randomize
