It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
