Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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