Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
